Mom, where would I be without you? You brought me into this world, you raised me right, and when the time came, you took a trip to the brewery with me to wait on a 2 hour line for some barleywine. I’m so proud to call you my mother!

You taught me all the important things in life: manners, hard work, respect, and most importantly, the value of a dollar. For example, it’s imperative that you get a double allotment of a BA stout, so you can flip one for twice the cost and get yours for free. Sure, I missed my kids’ ball game to secure two bottles, but this particular stout is inspired by ice cream, so maybe he can have a sip of mine when I get home later.

You instilled in me a deep love of family that I hold to this day. Some of my favorite memories are of me, you and grandma, god rest her soul, waking up and being first in line for a secret release. We secured the super rare triple allotment, and we did it together. Nana couldn’t even drink these beers because of her diabetes, but I like to think that she’s looking down on us and is proud of the cellar we’ve created.

With you, family comes above all. When I was a little short on cash because of that whole custody battle, you spotted me time and time again so I never ran out of IPAs to drink. You probably don’t realize it, but being able to get drunk every night is what got me through those tough days during that time of my life. You even let me take over the basement again when Sheila won the house in the divorce, just like when I was in high school! 

So cheers to you, the best mom in the world! I can’t imagine going through life, and most of all, line life, without you. Happy Mother’s Day! 

P.S. I booked us dinner at a BYO spot, your favorite!